Influencer Shares the Phrases She 'Banned' Her Fiancé from Saying During Their Wedding Vows (Exclusive)
Influencer Shares the Phrases She 'Banned' Her Fiancé from Saying During Their Wedding Vows (Exclusive)
Meredith WilshereSun, March 15, 2026 at 8:30 PM UTC
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Sydney BarkerCredit: Courtesy of Sydney Barker -
Sydney Barker is banning overused and "corny" phrases from her and her fiancé's wedding vows
She believes phrases like "we've had a lot of ups and downs" and "you are my rock" feel inauthentic
Barker hopes her vows will be heartfelt and original rather than sounding like pre-written greeting card messages
Most brides and grooms have a “do not play” list of songs for the dance floor, but influencer Sydney Barker has another “do not” list — specifically concerning her and her fiancé's vows.
In a now-viral TikTok, the 29-year-old content creator shared that she’s banning "unoriginal" and “corny” phrases from her upcoming nuptials and has created a "do not use phrases list" to give to her soon-to-be husband.
“These are phrases that I absolutely do not want to hear when we’re standing up at the altar. If I do hear them, I might say no,” Barker started off her video, which has since amassed over 300,000 views.
Sydney BarkerCredit: Courtesy of Sydney Barker
The first one, she shared, is the phrase "we’ve had a lot of ups and downs," which she thinks "screams that you’ve gone through some rough patches where you probably should have broken up."
“When I see a couple say this, when I see somebody write that in their Instagram caption, for example, I automatically think that someone cheated, at some point," she said, adding, "I just think that phrase is toxic, and I don’t want that impression to be left on anybody who is witnessing our vows.”
She also doesn't want her fiancé to use any iteration of "you are my rock," which, in her opinion, "feels very fake," and like something "you heard someone else say."
“There’s nothing wrong with it, it just feels very unoriginal, and I think he could come up with something better from his heart that is an original thought," she said. "‘You are my human’ or ‘you are my person’ has the same vibe as ‘you are my rock.’ It’s just very unoriginal, and it makes me cringe every time I hear it."
Similarly, the phrases "you are my forever" and "a life full of laughter" don't feel "original" to Barker.
"There's literally a song about that. I don’t want you to say something that's in a Daughtry song," she added, pointing to the rocker's 2009 hit "Life After You."
Sydney BarkerCredit: Courtesy of Sydney Barker
The last "banned" expression is “you’re my partner in crime."
All of these phrases, she insisted, “just sound like they would be on wedding coasters you could buy off Amazon.”
“Everything needs to come from the heart, and it can’t just be these random corny phrases that have been regurgitated in thousands of wedding speeches," she concluded.
While she admittedly meant the video "more as a joke," she wanted to share her thoughts since she knew they would "resonate with a lot of other girls."
"Because I actually genuinely would cringe if he did say any of these things at the altar. Just asking for some originality, that’s all," she ended.
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However, social media users had very strong thoughts on Barker's video, and didn't shy away from telling her in the comments section.
“I was really surprised to see how passionate people were about this topic and to see how many people agreed with me so deeply," Barker tells PEOPLE. "They were definitely a few people that were offended by my takes, but that’s ok, not everyone gets it."
Barker has been engaged to her fiancé, Brendan Berry, since July 2024. The couple is set to tie the knot on March 14, 2026.
After her video went viral, Barker made a follow-up video, sharing a few more phrases that she’s banning, saying, “If you disagree with any of these, well, good thing it's my wedding and not yours.”
“I don't want my husband's vows to me to look like they came from a card at Walgreens, you know?" she said.
On the list were popular sayings like "doing this crazy thing called life with you" and "I love you to the moon and back."
Sydney BarkerCredit: Courtesy of Sydney Barker
Another "very similar" phrase to one mentioned in her first video is "we've been through hell and back."
"Now, obviously, there's some nuance here. If you and your fiancé have been through something like incredibly earth-shattering, that is different," she explained, noting that she and her fiancé “haven't really been through anything," so it wouldn't make sense for him to say.
“Someone also said if you're gonna get up there and say ‘we've had a lot of ups and downs’ or ‘we've been through hell and back,’ then you better be ready to share those downs with the audience," she joked. "I agree with that because if you say that in your vows, then that's just gonna leave room for people to imagine what the downs were, what 'hell and back' means."
Another common wording she hears at weddings is when people start by saying, "If you would've told me five years ago I would be standing here, I wouldn't have believed you," which is also banned from Barker's big day.
"That is just giving like you're settling or like you didn't think that you would be marrying me," she said. However, she noted that, like the last one, "there are some nuanced situations where there was tragedy involved."
The final phrase that Barker is "on the fence about" is "you are my best friend."
“I do feel like that about my fiancé. So I'm personally trying to figure out a better way to say that in my own vows because I want to say something like that, but I just feel like that phrase is, again, really overdone," she shared.
While the last one doesn't "ick" her out as much as the other phrases, when it comes to her vows, Barker emphasized that she's hoping to be original and heartfelt.
on People
Source: “AOL Entertainment”
